Christmas Vibes

Love Is in the Air

We sat there, the sun beginning to set, a cool breeze moving through the open courtyard. The sound of a harmonica carried softly in the background, weaving through conversation. Behind us, the red rocks of Sedona glowed that deep, burnt orange they slip into just before dusk. We had spent the day at the creek, hiking back into town, a little tired, a little sun-kissed.

Now we were at ChocolaTree Organic Eatery, the epitome of Sedona life. Earthy, a little magical, organic everything. We were sipping our lattes, half-listening to the performer.

My friend nodded toward him.
“He’s cute.”

Man bun. Hippie vibes.
I shook my head. Not that he wasn’t attractive, he just wasn’t my type. Definitely more hers. Bonus points for the muscial talent.

That’s when she said it.

“I made a manifestation jar with all my future partner’s traits.”

“Aww, that’s really sweet,” I replied.

Listen, I’m no skeptic. I make a vision board every year. I believe in the Law of Attraction, or at least in being intentional about what we’re calling in. I sincerely hope she manifests her dream person.

That moment pulled me back to a conversation I had about a year ago with a childhood friend. Not when we were kids, but recently, two adults, sitting in something familiar, trying to make sense of love.

We debated whether you fall in love with a person… or because they possess certain traits you find desirable.

At the time, I was firm.
Love is deeper than that, I said. Soul-level. The traits don’t matter.

He had just had an epiphany, that it would “make sense” for him to be with someone who had many of the qualities he’d been seeking. I remember thinking it sounded too logical. Too curated. Somewhat transactional.

Now, I think I was wrong.

Because love? It can absolutely exist without alignment.
You can love someone who doesn’t share your values.
Who doesn’t show up the way you need.
Who lacks the very traits you once said didn’t matter.

And for a while, love carries it.

Until it doesn’t.

The traits (values, beliefs, consistency, how someone treats you) those aren’t superficial. They’re the structure. The thing that holds the relationship when feelings fluctuate.

And maybe that’s the truth of it.
Love doesn’t filter. It doesn’t check for compatibility. It just… happens.

Compatibility is what decides if it stays.

Maybe it was never soul or traits.
Maybe it’s both.

But love alone… isn’t always enough.

As I sit here writing, I can’t help but think back to someone I was absolutely crazy about, someone I truly adored. Infatuation at full volume. A kind of case study in what happens when your soul falls, completely and unapologetically, for someone else’s.

He didn’t embody everything I needed in a partner, though some of those qualities were there. At times, he lacked empathy and struggled to be understanding, and between timing and other challenges, there was always a sense of disconnect between us.

And yet, every time I saw his face, my eyes lit up like a Christmas tree.

At some point, though, the lights went out. And it felt less like they faded and more like they were ripped straight from the tree (metaphorically speaking). Heartbreak on another level.

Spoiler alert, we didn’t end up together.

I think, in the end, he was more like a strand of bright, multicolored lights, while I had grown into a softer, more understated glow. I’m not sure I was ever the kind of light he was looking for.

Still… Christmas will always be my favorite holiday.

Just kidding.

That title’s reserved for my birthday. (Shoutout to my fellow Scorpios.)

But it’s a sweet sentiment, isn’t it?

Here’s to manifesting our heart’s desires,

LC