“We did have a session this morning at 10, right?”
$#!%
I read the text 30 minutes later and my stomach dropped. I had completely forgotten to put the appointment on my calendar. It’s a rare occurrence, which almost made it worse. And the timing… not great. I had just had to cancel our last session because of a migraine with aura (the kind I get maybe once or twice a year) and of course it happened during this client’s time.
“Next one is on the house!” I replied immediately. It was the least I could do for feeling… honestly, incompetent in that moment.
I put the new date in my calendar right away and then sat at my kitchen counter thinking; what is going on with me lately?
Because on paper, I’ve been doing really well. I’ve recently lost weight (safely, medically supervised). I haven’t had alcohol in months. No sweet treats, no added sugar, nothing “bad.” Physically, I feel great.
But if I’m being honest? I’ve also been a little on edge. Sleep has been off. Insomnia creeping in. And it hit me, maybe this is part of it.
When you start living clean and clear, you don’t just lose the habits… you lose the numbing. Food, drinks, distractions… they soften the edges more than we realize. And when they’re gone, you feel everything a little more sharply.
The doctor did mention that people sometimes feel more when they are consuming less. At the time I nodded. Now I get it.
Moments like this are where self-compassion actually matters.
Not in the highlight reel of progress.
Not when everything is going right.
But here, when you mess up. When you feel embarrassed. When your inner dialogue gets a little harsh.
Self-compassion sounds like:
“I don’t love that this happened… and I’m still a good therapist.”
“I made a mistake… and I can repair it.”
“I’m doing a lot of things right… and I’m still allowed to be human.”
Healing isn’t this perfect, polished version of you who never drops the ball.
It’s you noticing when you do, taking accountability, making it right, and not abandoning yourself in the process.
Even therapists have their own shit.
Especially therapists.
With grace (for all of us),
LC
Vibe with Me LC 